What The Heck Is "Hand Paella"?

I always keep my eyes out for new Spanish restaurants around the San Francisco Bay Area, so naturally an EaterSF headline beginning with "Gin, Sherry, and 'Hand Paella'..." quickly caught my eye. Now, I'm the self-proclaimed Paella Queen, and I have never heard of "hand paella." Not even once. Of course, I had to click through and investigate.

First, background on cocktail bar ABV. Yeah, yeah, I know, I know. (If you aren't local to SF or you don't know, it's worth reading. The bar-within-a-bar concept is pretty trendy here right now, so you may start to see it around where you live.) I learn that the latest incarnation of Over Proof is a gin and sherry bar called Este Oeste, where Chef Collin Hilton has created a limited-time Spanish-inspired menu. Yum. With you so far.

But what about the "hand paella"? You can't just throw out a term like that and drop the mic, leaving us all hanging. Unfortunately, that's exactly what they're doing. There's a sneak peak of the menu, listing this confounding dish again, but no explanation as to what exactly it is or how it is made.

So I go poking through the photo slideshow, and there it is. Hand paella. Looks like rectangular slices of congealed rice, slightly brown on one side. I'm immediately reminded of those savory glutinous rice balls you get at dim sum, which leaves me more confused. What defines this specifically as paella, with no pan and no soccarat? (It would already be disqualified by the purists based solely on the ingredients list; chorizo is a no-no for traditionalists.) One of the defining characteristics is that the individual grains remain separate, hence the need for special paella rice. What is binding these polygonal rice creations together? Rice starch? If so, doesn't that make them more like Spanish-flavored risotto? So many questions. No answers.

I start to wonder if I'm losing touch. I google. Sigh of relief. No, it's not just me. "Hand paella" is not a thing... until now?

This is going to haunt me, folks. If anyone is headed to Over Proof between now and October 27, please let me know. I'd love to go over there and taste the mystery myself, but paying $75 for six courses to resolve questions about one of them is a little too neurotic, even for me. Sponsorship welcome. ;)
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

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